The real source of my bullying was the extra weight I've carried since childhood. Oh, sure, I've had the word "faggot" hurled at me - and the sad truth is, I'd be shocked if a gay man hadn't - but it was always secondary. In many ways I was lucky to have come of age in a liberal enclave where my sexuality was accepted if not embraced. I felt shame over my size long before I had any concept of my sexuality, and years after coming out as gay, I still feel anxious identifying as fat.Īs an openly gay writer, one of the questions I'm asked most often is, "Were you bullied growing up?" And the answer is yes, but it's never the answer they're looking for. I knew I was fat because people told me I was fat, either directly (a slap to the stomach and an unkind word) or in subtler ways (having a teacher rifle through my lunch box and comment on the contents). When you grow up overweight, everyone notices - not just your classmates, who are too young to have mastered the art of tact, but also friends' parents and teachers.
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